Have I been through breakups that left me devastated? Absolutely. Have I taken a loss on a job or client. Of course! It’s the circle of life in which no one is all-powerful at every given moment. Where there is power, there is failure as everything in life is entwined. There are moments where I ride the high of the waves and other occasions where I feel totally defeated at low tide. But, I never lose my worth in the process.
And, every time I’m at low tide it feels as though my heart is being shattered into little pieces, yet I look for my strength in solitude. When you are unable to achieve what you want in that exact moment of sheer desire, it can often feel like a failure or emotional rejection.
But, do I think I’m a failure? Not a chance.
I want to share with you why every struggle, setback, heartbreak, and challenging situation has impacted my life for the better and helped me achieve my success.
If it’s one thing I know, it’s how to make a comeback that will have your enemies cringing with envy.
What You’ll Need To Make The Ultimate Comeback:
Anytime you experience a loss, the most important thing you can do is commit to pouring all your energy into loving yourself. Because the healthier the relationship is with yourself, the happier you will feel about your purpose in this world.
At any given moment of defeat, you can feel emotionally held hostage. However, taking action and doing something for yourself can inspire you to alter your emotional state. This can have you from feeling less than ideal to gaining back your internal power. And, one of the best ways to take care of your emotions is by establishing a healthy daily regimen.
Self-soothing helps you redirect your focus and energy towards elevating your life to strive ahead.
With that being said, not all losses can emotionally weigh you down, but mentally they can take a toll on your performance. Getting outside of your fear-based thinking is the first step to making your comeback because not much can be achieved if you are in a deep rut about your fullest potential.
A growth mindset entails having a positive perspective on life, even when you have to jump through hoops. When you have self-doubt or self-deprecating thoughts, it becomes a mental game you are playing with yourself. Remember, the past is already gone and the future has yet to arrive. So, say goodbye to the noisy conscious voice in your head and hello to your inner voice that holds your true power.
A daily regimen that benefits my optimal performance and love for myself is healthy eating, exercising five to six days a week, positive self-talk, writing, cooking, detox baths and working strategically on my goals. While everyone is different, you’ll need to discover what best suits you to make sure you’re on track to nurturing your mind, body and spirit.
Did you know confidence is silent, yet the most powerful tool you have? If you are a confident individual, then you know how to rock it without saying a word. It is probably the exact reason you attract your ideal clients or your ex-partner in the first place.
Going through a loss can weigh on your self-esteem heavily. It can have you thinking things about yourself that are not true. You may think “I’m not lovable”, “I’m not smart enough”, or “I’m never going to be successful. I’m completely worthless.”
It’s your responsibility to hold yourself accountable or hire a coach to help you overcome your thinking patterns that prevent you from valuing your capabilities for relationship success, both personally and professionally.
You have to tell yourself you are a badass and don’t let anyone tell you differently, including yourself!
Combating weaknesses and insecurities begins with a daily practice of positive affirmations. Being able to rewire your brain by eliminating false beliefs and replacing them with healthy, truthful beliefs gives you the courage to honor who you are inside and out. The energy you put out into the world is the same energy you’ll receive in return. And, the only kind of comeback we are making is a powerful, yet positive one.
Everyday you’ll want to write down three positive affirmations to overcome any doubts or negative beliefs you have about yourself. The easiest way is by taking a negative, false belief and flipping it into a positive, true belief.
Determination is your best friend when it comes to conquering your goals. It’s one of the easiest ways to get a jump start on your comeback regimen, yet don’t be discouraged when you hit a lull. It happens to the best! Finding the courage to trust yourself and the process will be crucial, as each day is a new day to try again. Taking each day one step at a time helps you find the power of now because nothing great was achieved overnight.
Live in the NOW=WON the moment!
Let your setback be the fuel you need to achieve new heights by increasing your performance and productivity. Prove to yourself why you are the most valuable person in your life and the best team player. Above all, rise each moment with grace, confidence, and kindness.
Becoming numb to “No” will keep you pushing ahead. Because only you decide what you are capable of, not anyone else. You already have everything you need within you to push yourself to succeed. Not every client you speak with, every job you apply for, or every person you have a romantic interest with will necessarily be the perfect match. We can learn overtime that some things are meant to fall through so better things can happen.
When you’re making a comeback you will need to set goals. And, with goals comes strategy. It’s like playing a game of chess, you are in it to win it. The best kept secrets are kept to yourself. Allowing your success to be your noise is the best policy, instead of telling others your strategic plan.
The ultimate comeback is all about the reveal of your results.
Maybe your goal is to land your next big client, or attract a romantic partner, or perhaps it’s to become the best version of yourself. Ultimately, you win when you elevate your life solely for the purpose of yourself. The more value you add to your life the more you will be desired, admired, and sought after.
In fact, many of my successes have been built in my most vulnerable times. Every business I have built has been launched after going through a painful setback. It has catapulted me into my own success and made me that much stronger. I am thankful for my losses as they have given me strength to grow.
And as a coach, I often get asked, “How are you such a badass? You make it look so easy.” I often tell them, “I live and breathe everything I want. I don’t give up even when things get tough. I continue to pursue my goals because they are more powerful than the emotion I feel during an upward climb.”
Boundaries are about having integrity with yourself and others. This is how you show up everyday according to your values and what makes you tick each day. If you get off on a beaten path, your values take precedence over the distractions leading you back to yourself. Having integrity is crucial to your success story because being consistent is key to getting results.
When you have boundaries in your life, you feel internally and externally powerful because your words and actions hold weight. You are able to trust yourself to cultivate the relationships you need while also saying, “no” to people or things that don’t serve a purpose in your life.
Boundaries are the ultimate skill that you can’t live without and it keeps you accountable, but also mentally and emotionally healthy. Without boundaries, you may allow others actions or words to dictate your journey which leads to self-abandonment. This is the opposite of self-love.
The best way to identify your personal limitations is during moments when others have disrespected you or using your personal core values. This will bring clarity and more certainty in your life, so you have a clear vision of what you need to thrive regardless of what challenges you face in your discovery process.
When it comes to making the best decisions for your ultimate comeback, it will require you to rise above the deep trenches and continue to track ahead even when you are tiresome. And when one strategy doesn’t work, then try another. Regardless of the pain you experience and the obstacles you encounter, your opportunities will appear the minute you breakthrough what is keeping you stuck. Throughout the process, keep in mind your long-term goals need to outweigh your short-term emotions.