Are they arrogant or confident?
These two words seem to get interchanged quite often when it comes to understanding your partner’s demeanor and mindset. Yet, how they treat you can make all the difference in clarifying which one they fall under.
Arrogance can be seen as having an offensive attitude of superiority over their partner along with a grandiose sense of self. A partner who speaks from a place of insecurity will tend to talk above you or at you, making you feel inferior as a partner in the relationship. They believe in ME, not WE.
Confidence is seen as having assurance and self-reliance while speaking with conviction about a topic of subject. A partner who communicates from a place of value will be respectful and talk with you engaging in a constructive conversation, even if you have a difference of opinions. They are all about WE, not ME.
Here are 10 Differences Between An Arrogant And Confident Partner:
1. Do As I Say, Not As I Do
An arrogant partner will tell you exactly what is on their mind, but rarely has congruences based on their actions. Their words seem to hold little truth because they are only focused on what they need to say to talk a big game even though they will likely do the complete opposite a few hours later. Everything becomes a double standard in their book. And, if you act in a similar way, then you are the one to blame for their inappropriate actions. They are great at flipping the script because they refuse to admit their mistakes or have it be brought to their attention. In fact, they will gaslight you until you give in to their demands.
A confident partner will have integrity when it comes to their words and actions. They are likely to express exactly what they feel and think, making them dependable and reliable partners. It is much easier to place trust on a confident partner because their actions are in alignment with their words. This type of partner will keep their promises without giving you false hope because they value what they have to offer and know the benefits of showing up as their best self.
2. Believes In Me, Not We
Arrogant partners are all about themselves because they lack confidence when it comes to being transparent and vulnerable. They live with deep rooted fears making it challenging to connect since they don’t want to blow their cover. This type of partner will keep you at arm’s length distance, preventing a deeper connection. Being open about their feelings makes them uncomfortable underneath their mask because it allows them to play it safe. They constantly live in their heads making it feel like there is a constant missing piece to the puzzle. And if you bring up your concerns and desires, they find a way to turn the conversation back around on them and what they want leaving you unfulfilled.
On the flip side, a confident person will want to include their partner throughout their lifestyle. They have no problem honoring the relationship first and foremost knowing that’s what it takes to have a healthy relationship with a partner. They look at solving disagreements in the relationship from a WE perspective instead of ME versus you. And, they are willing to express their most vulnerable emotions to connect with their partner to increase their emotional intimacy. A confident will not shy away from being forthcoming in their intentions towards their partner.
3. Selfish With Their Time, Not Into Quality Time
Feel like you have to beg for their time? Anytime you ask, they already have plans or are too busy with work? An arrogant person is very selfish about who they spend their time with and rarely will it include you in their plans, or if they do it only includes what they wish to do. They enjoy spending the majority of their time with acquaintances because they need constant reassurance to feel alive. It is unlikely you will find this type of partner sitting at home alone with their thoughts, as they like to stay busy to avoid the void within themselves. And, since they already have you where they want you, they don’t feel the need to nurture the connection any further. They will make time when you are finally fed up with their selfish ways, but only to make you feel worthless because they will complain about what they are not doing with their friends.